When you lose someone you love, you may need coping styles to deal with grief on a daily basis. In other words, you will need to learn with grief-coping skills that will help you through. Here are a few that can possible help you ease the pain.
Whether you like it or not, one of life’s biggest certainty is death. In order to deal with grief on a daily basis, you will need to accept and acknowledge this fact. Grief makes no sense to most people, particularly if they have never been through having to deal with someone dying in their lives. Questions such as “Why people we love are taken from our lives through death” or “Why do they even have to die in the first place” will be sure to pop up in your mind when you first experience the death of someone you love.
Dealing with Loss
You can try to desensitize, medicate or numb the pain but there is still nothing you can do that will take it away. It will still hurt underneath it all. Sit down and allow your pain to flow any which way it needs to. At times, this could mean beating up your pillow or lashing out in anger. Other times it might mean bawling your eyes out till you sleep or lying curled up in a ball. Let your feelings flow in the moments when they need to. It is natural to feel sorrow and grief when someone close to you passes away. For people who are extra sensitive, these emotions might be intensely magnified and felt to the innermost being. Take note that the pain becomes stronger when you try and resist it. You might even feel emotions so strong going through you that you might think that these could kill you, but they won’t. After a while you will not only survive the influx of emotions but you could simply let them come in and flow out. When you allow yourself to feel pain, this is a big step in the direction of healing.
You may also become more sensitive to the pain of others. When someone in the family dies, the influx of emotions may seem overwhelming. It may be hard to sift through which ones belong to you. Let yourself feel everything without filtering, criticism or judgement. Let every feeling flow as this speeds up healing.
Fixation on Loss
When you experience something as tragic and emotionally wrenching as losing someone you love, you might develop a fixation on loss, in general. You might start developing fears about, for example, the superstition that death comes in 3s. You may develop fears of losing everyone you love such as your partner, siblings or parents. Deep pain can turn into the fear or the same thing happening again. Remember that this is part of the emotional processing and that your fears are not real. This should help you through.