The big day for dad is coming on June 17th. This is a special day we all set aside to honor our fathers, but sometimes honoring isn’t an easy thing to do. There are really great fathers and some that haven’t been very present in our lives. This especially includes divorced parents. If the child was young when this occurred, they may not have many memories of him at all. So this brings us to “what do we do with those feelings of disappointment, anger or guilt” when we think of the “father” we see as less than perfect?
All of these thoughts and feelings of hurt, shame, fear or whatever should be taken to our Heavenly Father and laid at his feet. Only He knows what it’s like to feel anger toward a birth-father for never even trying to be a part of a child’s life. It can certainly cause a strained relationship with a new, adopted or step dad. Feelings of disappointment and bitterness need to be released, as God knew and allowed every detail of our lives and only wants the very best for us all. These feelings can then be replaced with a love that can only come from the heart of God.
In Exodus 20:12 CSB it says to honor your father so that you may have a long life in the land that Lord your God is giving you and doesn’t mean if you HAD a good father, honor him. We are not worthy of judging our dads. If we honor our parents, God will bless us with a long life in the land He’s promised to us. Feelings of resentment only bring us sadness and anger.
We all make mistakes and need to find it in our hearts to forgive others. Isn’t that what we are taught by God? There are ways to say the right words to honor your dad or father-in-law on Father’s Day even if you find it hard. It doesn’t mean you have to say it’s to the best dad ever, but you can still honor thy father with a thoughtful card. There are many that just indicate that the Lord Bless you or have a special Father’s Day without getting all mushy.
Put your negative and grudging feelings behind you and just make this an enjoyable day for everyone, including the father with which you have had little quality time. Bitterness will only reap more disappointment and God knew and allowed every detail of our life before we were born.
Dr Fredda Branyon